Turn that frown upside down.
We know how you feel. You've been riding at this mountain for 12 years, and who let all these damn tourists on the lifts, anyway? Airblaster designed the Grumpy Jacket just for you, you bitter old bastard. You can even pretend they designed it 12 years ago, if it makes you feel any better.
To keep your brittle old bones from freezing on cold powder days and frigid nights, the Grumpy uses 100g synthetic insulation and a 10K-rated waterproof shell. Fully taped seams eliminate the typical weak spots in your waterproofing. The longer cut adds a little bit of protection and covers your plumber butt, so you can bend over to pick up a nickel without offending everyone behind you. Not that you would care about that, anyway. Zippered, mesh-lined underarm vents let you air out that musty old-man smell when you need to. Of course, Airblaster equipped the Grumpy with a pocket protector for your calligraphy pen or your hunting knife and elbow patches so you don't blow out the elbows the next time you have a coronary and hit the ground hard.