And if they still give you any grief, just beat them up in the parking lot with one of your flip-flop sandals. The beanie isn't good for beating people up.
Next time somebody accuses you of flip-flopping, just state that you simply weren't aware before that global warming was real. You thought it was another goddamn treehugger conspiracy to get us to use less of the oil God gave us. So wear your Dakine Flip Flop Beanie with pride, whether you're still driving your truck or you moved on to a cruiser bike with wicked-cool streamers on the handlebars .