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Folks, show some diplomacy and tact in your ad copy.
This is disgusting and unkind:
"Like a $10,000 a night call-girl, the Burton Mens SLX Snowboard Boot is worth every penny if you have the cash. Expect immediate response to your every demand, the perfect amount of cushion, toasty warmth, and a glove-like fit."
I will purchase my snowboard boots elsewhere.